Most people are lost

They want to improve but don't know how. Feeling lost and stuck in their own negative mind.

• Wake up

• Scroll

• Watch TV

• Waste time

• Go to a job you hate

• Go home

• Repeat

Stuck in bad habits and unsure how to move forward. It's a slow death that most people face.

Which is not their fault.

They have the drive to change but don't know how.

They know where the treasure chest is but lack the roadmap to follow.

So they end up numbing themselves from the pain they're feeling. Distractions piling up, eating junk food to feel safe and making excuses so you can run away from life.

It's a trap most people fall into. Your ego tells you —"You're fine" but you know you're not.

When you try to change, you do it too hard. When you tell others about your progress they drag you down with negativity and doubt.

I've been there. I know what it feels like. You feel drowning in a world full of options.

You get intimidated to start. Change feels impossible when you think about what you're going to do.

Then ultimately people quit.

But I know you're different. You're not like most people. You reading this newsletter proves that's true. (most people don't try to learn).

By the end of this this letter you'll be able to know the different barriers that's stopping you from making the change and learn how to overcome them.

The 3 barriers that stops people from reaching their potential.

Let's face it. We know what's holding us back but we don't know how exactly the reason why it's holding us back.

We know doom scrolling is bad but how is it bad?

What's the science behind it? What's the reason why it's bad?

Let's go deep.

Let's understand the reasons why people are involuntarily holding back themselves without meaning to.

1). Distractions: The silent potential killer

Distraction is a form of escapism.

There's nothing more sad than a person who has the potential and energy to create meaningful work but waste it by laughing at memes and calling it a day.

Distractions makes you lose focus. They lead to decreased productivity and motivation. They make you feel overwhelmed and anxious.

It keeps you procrastinating from the work you should be doing.

They come in many forms. Entertainment, media, gossiping, being in bad company (bad friends) etc..

Most distractions come from a lack of meaning.

It leads to discomfort and negative emotions.

People seek out external distractions to escape from the things they hate.

• Doom Scrolling: You go to social media because you want fun. You want to look at memes and see wholesome videos but that innocent 5 minute scroll will turn into self-hate seeing how other people are doing so much better than you. (I talked about this in the previous letter).

• Movies appeal to people because it gives us the illusion of the perfect life we could've had. The perfect life where girl meets boy. Where destiny shapes us even if the odds are stacked. But reality is disappointing. Romance in real life doesn't work like romance in movies. So this illusion keeps people addicted. Because maybe one day they'll also experience that true love or perfect adventure thrill.

• Gossiping: hating other people because they're better than you is the trait of crab mentality. You should avoid talking bad to other people, because this teaches your mind to be a loser.

• Hanging out with low quality friends: People who are not doing anything to improve their life should be avoided. These kinds of people will hate you if you get better than them. They'll drag you down to their level by introducing vices and innocent but incredibly sensitive comments. They will brush off your achievement like it's nothing. There's no merit to hanging out with low quality people.

I've been in the same trajectory.

I had friends who would criticize my hard work.

I've spent 6-12 hours a day scrolling 2 years ago. Discovering self-improvement/personal development shifted my mindset.

And I'm here to help you do the same.

Moving on.

2). Perfectionism: How being flawless stops you from making progress

We have a naturally tendency to overcomplicate simple things.

We want the best strategy, best tactic, best method and the best way to do something.

This is the reason why you're not making any progress.

You can't accept the current you. You're afraid of confronting how little progress you've made over the years.

So you want to compensate by knowing what's the fastest way to do something.

But this is exactly what's holding you back. You're not supposed to figure out everything from the first try.

You want to skip the beginners stage so you can get onto the master's level under a month or two.

You don't allow yourself to make mistakes. You only want wins not the losses.

This makes you lose qualities that you could've gain when you're facing the pain of failure, how people treat you sh*t when you're project isn't working or family members doubt whether you can make it or not.

Failure is a gift.

It's a lesson that you'll remember for life.

You just have to make sure that failure won't make you bankrupt and lose all the previous progress you've made.

Failure is regret. And regret is painful.

You'll always remember the lesson regrets gave you —which in turn will help you avoid future problems.

Being flawless makes you lose experience and growth. You aren't learning when all you want is progress.

You got to accept the suck for a bit and learn how to divert that into progress.

And why do I know this?

I failed my first newsletter. I gave it up to start fresh.

For 1 year I had only gained 3 subscribers. 2 my other accounts and 1 a reader.

I didn't know how to get viewers. My writing sucked.

I would spend hours writing articles and get 1-3 likes. I was devastated but I had to learn.

I had to accept that my writing needs improvement not perfection.

I had to re-do and start again. Because if I didn't I'd still be running in circles frustrated why no one is reading my work —asking my self "What's wrong?", "Why am I not making progress?"

That's why my writing became relatable and useful. I spent a whole year failing.

Don't be afraid to fail. Be afraid that you've never failed once at the pursuit of something great.

3). Laziness: Anything worth pursuing starts with discipline

Without discipline you won't make progress.

Without discipline anything worth achieving becomes a fantasy.

Without discipline all your goals is good as dead.

If you lack discipline start by reading the article "Why You're Lazy and How To Fix It.

The only metric whether you can achieve your goals or not in life is by the level of your discipline.

Progress is not luck. It's not a one time practice. You have to hone it and put in the work daily.

That's how you achieve mastery.

If you can work without being motivated you'll go far in life.

Because discipline gives you energy. Energy allows you to be productive. Being productive makes you think of yourself positively.

It's a loop that results to a positive self-image.

That's how a winners mentality is born. Through the achievements you'll make —you will be able to remember your past accomplishments that will allow you to believe in yourself again.

Pushing you to work harder.

And when you get the thing you're after. It results to a stronger self-belief.

And that all starts with discipline.

The opposite is true.

The less disciplined you are the more you'll hate yourself.

• You know how much productive you could've been.

• You know how much progress you could've made.

• You know how much time you've wasted

And this all leads to self-loathing.

People hate themselves because they're mad at how undisciplined they are even if they don't admit it.

Your mind doesn't like to lie. It's brutal and honest —you can cope but the feeling of you can do more will never go away even if you're old.

You'll be left with regret and rumination of the past if you reject this feeling.

Don't do it.

Moving on….

How to improve Everyday.

Now that we're done talking about what's holding you back. Let's now dig deep into different strategies you can use to 10x your growth.

Let's keep it short and concise.

Good habits: Small improvement compounds to big results

Habits are vital.

You do them everyday.

They are the source of your energy. If your habits are draining your zest and mental strength then you're doing it wrong.

Because energy is fuel to the human body. Your capability to adapt in times of suffering and catastrophe comes from how much energy you are able to expend.

A quality life starts from your habits.

The rule is to make progress and be consistent. Not make exponential progress (this comes later).

You cannot expect yourself to grow fast in under 1-2 weeks. You have to be patient.

Put in the time and hone your abilities even when your mind and body says no.

This means showing up daily even if you don't want to. To build discipline and momentum.

Let's first define a good habit

In my definition "A good habit is a habitual behavior that aids a person into becoming a healthier, stronger and smarter individual"

So what good habits can we do?

We first need to hit 3 pillars.

• The Pillar of Health

• The Pillar of Wealth

• The Pillar of Relationship

Let's start with the—

1) The Pillar Of Health

Your health is a must.

You have to take good care of your body.

You must stop eating junk and stop putting garbage in your mind.

If you have a normal and functional body you're already winning. You were just blind to God's blessings.

If you were born with a disability or mental disorder your chances of success in life goes down in unimaginable numbers.

Be grateful you were born normal.

Your health can be easily divided into 3 parts. Which are the mental, physical and spiritual health. But for now we'll focus on holistic improvement.

To further improve your chances of growth you'll need to apply the following habits.

• Working out/Going to the gym- As a man your body is a fortress. You need to strengthen your defenses and enhance your bodily endurance. Not because it'll help you get girls but because it teaches you the essence of what it means to work hard in order to get results. The pain of lifting weights and pushing the limits of your body will allow you to understand growth comes in hardships not in comfort. You must pay the price and that price is putting in the effort to lift weights even when you don't want to and voluntarily suffer DOMS (Delayed onset muscle soreness).

• Meditation/ Mindfulness- Your mind is your life's biggest bully. That's a given even if you're a positive person you will experience negative thoughts. We are hard wired for survival that's why our senses for danger is so sharp that even if everything is alright your mind makes up threats that aren't real. You will need to create a barrier for your perception. A filtering mechanism that allows your positive thoughts to take over. To separate logical and rational thought from emotional thought to create distance. Because being mindful allows you to know what is emotion from what is thought. If you have trouble dealing with your emotions and thoughts overtaking. Practice mindfulness.

2) The Pillar of Wealth

Money matters. That's the absolute truth.

You can't say money doesn't matter when almost everything in the world has to be paid with money.

• Need to change roofs? —Pay with money

• Need a health care service? —Pay with money

• Need access to better tools? —Pay with money

You can use card but you get the point.

Why wealth?

Well wealth isn't just about money.

It's about:

• Wealth of mind

• Wealth of peace

• Wealth of abundance

The thing with wealth is —it pushes you to be a better person.

Money isn't evil. How people use money as a means to an end is what determines whether it is evil or good.

Your growth as a person can be measured by how much wealth you are able to make and create.

So, Noat are you saying we have to run a business? No not exactly (you can if you want to).

What you need is wealth of mind.

Your mental database is outdated. It's rusty and too old (If it wasn't you wouldn't be reading this newsletter).

Your growth is relational to the quality of information you consume.

If all you do is scroll mindlessly throughout the day your database needs maintenance and updates.

The developer (you) needs to put some restrains (rules & fixes) so the bugs (bad habits) don't wreak havoc and cause too much problems.

What good habits can we do to make sure we grow as fast as possible?

Here's an action step for you:

• Buy 2 books that caught your interest.

• For the next 30 days, commit to reading at least half of the page daily (don't double read if you miss the day, just read as normal).

• After 30 days write out a summary on each chapter of the book you've read without looking at the book (This should take at least 3-5 days so be patient).

• Repeat until you completely finish reading the 2 books.

• Proceed to apply what you've learned no matter how small.

Reading has the highest ROI when it comes to shifting your subconscious mind being able to understand nuanced and difficult topics.

Being able to connect the dots between 2 entirely different topic comes from abundance of knowledge.

Reading does this to you for free.

3). The Pillar of Relationship

People are social creatures.

You are hard wired to seek and find companions.

Whether it may be a partner or a group of friends.

Running away from this internal need to socialize will disable your capability to get along with other people.

That is why most people end up being people pleasers.

They don't understand why they seek acceptance and validation from people who don't care about them.

You don't need to be friends with everyone. You don't need to get along with everyone.

You just need to get good at holding good relationships.

And it's your job to make sure your relationships with other people stay healthy and functional. So you don't end up becoming crazy from loneliness.

This means having good relationship with your family (parents, brothers/sisters) and a few friends you trust.

The reason why most people fail is —because their social circle is garbage.

They have friends that mock, insult and say sensitive things without remorse (even if other people are around).

You got people that straight up disrespect you.

Your job is to leave, look in the other direction and never comeback. Even if you end up being alone it's much better than having to deal with internalize negative self-belief from what other people say about you.

Loneliness alone is bad. But loneliness with introspection is where real growth comes in.

The sh*t you go through without telling anyone is hard. You'll face demons you though you've already defeated before.

Insecurities come and haunt you daily. It's a battle of wits and mental strength.

You need people for the long term. You can get away with being a one man army when you're young but when you're old —you need companions.

Real G's who understand your mission and purpose.

Here's another action step for you:

• Starting today you will greet people and say "how are you doing". Whether it may be a classmate or an acquaintance you know.

• Start asking more questions about other people. Ask them "what's your plan today"? , "What are you working with now adays"? (people love talking about themselves).

This 2 should help you become more social. It's a process and you'll have to start from the bottom. But it works when you stick to it for the long run.

You'll be able to know what kind of friends you would like to have by simply asking.

You can tell who is serious for change and who is not. Stick with people who've got dreams and ambitions.

They make you work harder without meaning to. You'll achieve more by simply being around those kind of people.

It's a boost to have people who are on the same path as you.

Your habit of making small talk will also help you build confidence and rapport.

Creating new friendships automatically.

Invest in yourself. Use your time wisely.

You are an asset.

Your value is determined by where and how you spend your time.

Your time must be spent making your value as a person higher.

This means spending money to make your looks, skills and health level up.

The strongest growth tactic is to invest in yourself. Growing fast comes from self-investment.

No one's going to spend money on you unless you prove that you're worth it.

You need to stop wasting your time with friendship drama, exposure to negativity and learn how to replace it with valuable habits instead.

You've got to save yourself if no one is willing to.

Because your life as a man is already hard. Don't make it harder by not believing in yourself.

Growth has always been possible. You just haven't learned how to do it properly.

No matter how small growth is growth. Never let anyone stop you.

1% progress is better than 0%.

And apply the lessons you've learned in this letter (It's short but useful).

I hope this letter helps you out, this should give you some clarity on what it truly means to grow as a person. And see you next week.

-Noat (Author of Improvement Letters)

PS: Did you find this letter useful? If so kindly reply below and let me know. I'm collecting feedback to improve my structure and writing. Thanks!