To become someone worthy of respect your must first understand the value of respect.

Respect in it's most bare and naked form is the ability to make people be polite and keep foul language out of the way when talking to you.

If people treat you like you're expandable that most likely means you are not worthy of respect.

In most cases you might be but your actions don't.

To be someone worthy of respect you must first understand self-respect.

What is self-respect?

Remember the guys who were too polite and too kind?

Well of course you don't. They were non existent. And that's most likely you - no offense.

Because I was that person too.

I would share my opinion and people would ignore it. I would share insights and it would receive insults.

I know what it's like to be disrespected. I understand the frustration of people ignoring what you have to say especially when it's credible but gets shot down.

I included the quote above to show you the summary of how people pleasers are treated.

A person who always aims to please other people is someone who has no original belief, opinions and ideas.

And when that happens you become expendable. Because you are sheep with no original thought or personality.

When people look at you they think you are not worth their time.

To counter this you must understand self-esteem and self-respect.

The line from the quote above is true "It isn’t fair, but if your vibration/vitality is low then the world targets you ruthlessly. It will quite literally kick you while you’re down"

Time and time again I've always noticed this fact. When you allow disrespect and have no boundaries people will continue to disrespect you.

People will bully.

As a matter of fact most people who are good, have strong self-control. They understand inflicting harm to other people is not good.

But most people are not good.

Most people are emotional and angry.

To solve this problem you need to cultivate self-respect.

You would need:

• Self-confidence

• Self-belief

• Boundaries

Easier said than done. However in this letter I'll dive deep to help you become a person worthy of respect.

But first to earn self-respect you need to honor your words.

And that leads to our first lesson which is-

Keep Your Promises

When you promise to get "X" project done at "Z" day get it done Don't make excuses about how you had to do something else.

The only acceptable excuse would be an emergency. Let's say you passed out for a day and needed to rest. And that's acceptable.

But if you clearly knew that you wasted your time - other people will know it. They will know your bullshit and will call you out.

"A man of his word" is a reputation you should have with yourself and to others. If people know you keep your promise they are more likely to help and respect you.

And if you know you keep promises to yourself you are more likely to respect yourself.

That's why when you make excuses—you have this sensation of disappointment and regret.

That's you losing respect from yourself. Because inside us are different parts that work together.

The most common one I talk about is the higher and lower self.

• The lower self is the one who always seeks pleasure and gratification. It's the part of you that makes you watch porn, doom scroll and waste your potential.

• The higher self is the brutally honest critic self. It doesn't care about your feelings. It will say what it will say regardless if you are able to take it positively or negatively. It's the part of yourself that says the truth.

Keeping your promises comes at the cost of responsibility and commitment. When you say something and you break it—understand people will no longer trust you because what you say and do isn't consistent.

Do what you say you'll do

When keeping promises to yourself—understand that you have a reputation system built inside you.

Every time you make excuses, procrastinate on what you have to do—you lose points of self-respect.

And every time you keep your promise, do your work on time and no longer make excuses you gain points of self-respect.

Life is very similar to video games. We aren't able to levels and experience we gain ,but we can feel and act on it.

Be Brutally honest

Whatever fault you have own it. Whatever responsibility you have own it.

Do not look for people to blame. Do not look for people for help.

Even if you have to do it alone - then do it alone. Respect is always a process that's built entirely on you.

When you make a mistake look at what you should do next not what could've gone better.

When you are having hard times stay grounded because being emotional will not help.

Most people will never be able to attain their potential merely because of how much they lie to themselves. They are unable to be honest about what they lack and what they can improve.

They underestimate their weaknesses and overestimate their strengths. Not only this leads to arrogance but also lost opportunities.

I know I talked about having delusional self-belief. This case is different. When you think you're better off or need better opportunities and start ignoring beginner level opportunities - you stay stagnant instead of growing.

As a result you stay low value or worse you become non-existent.

Not only you will be treated like trash you will also become expandable.

You will be blamed even if its not your fault.

When making rules follow it

The best leaders are those who show they follow the rules they make and own it.

If you say you won't be late don't be late.

If you say you are good at X topic be good at it.

Never make something up that you are unable to get through. People do not care about your limits - only your abilities.

To be someone worthy of respect your actions and words need to be consistent. Do not create drama, problems and sh*t you can't solve.

That's precisely why many people fail to be leaders. Because the very rules they make they aren't able to follow.

If you want respect keep your words and actions. If you want to stay respected follow through on the principles you have.

People trust the consistent even if it makes you predictable. Because once trust is broken it will always remain broken.

Do not pretend when you don't know

When you are asked for something or an opinion do not pretend that you are an expert about it.

Do not say things that you do not know about. Do not say that you know it even if you don't.

People respect honesty. Because honestly is humility. Sure people might judge you or say "bro your so dumb, you don't even know about X?"

Understand than when people do this it's a projection of their self towards you. Or either they actually hate you in secret.

And when people try to be fickle or get an emotional reaction out of you don't react.

A proper person with respect to you will not say something like that. In any case not everyone will respect you.

And that leads us to the next lesson.

Be in control: Keep your emotions in check

People love to bully emotional people because it validates their ego. I know this is not something many of you want to hear but I'll say it "Human cruelty is real".

Cruelty can vary in terms of physical abuse, verbal abuse etc..

People want to feel superior. And the most common way people do that is by getting an reaction out of someone.

They like it best especially if you over react and over explain. It validates their ego towards you because right now they are above and you are below.

This is something many people will not talk about. Because deep down everyone's aware of this.

That's why when someone irks you or try to get an emotional reaction out of you: Just don't do anything. Take a deep breathe and just look at them. Do nothing.

You'll look cold but they'll get the signal "Not me bro I do not fuck around".

This can backfire if the attacks become physical. When that happens do play fight. Don't hit them for real but like hit them like you are playing around. Hit them hard enough to know you're not a push over but not too much it leads to a real fight or injuries.

If you don't fight back you'll just receive more of it. This is risky if you are a full grown adult.

If you are an adult and it's another adult person hitting you just go away. Going into jail and bailing out is not worth it.

However if you are high school kid this is very common. Kids like to test other kids. And the one who doesn't fight back receives the most bullying.

Another course of action you can do is just stand still look at them and slowly move away. It will either work or not.

They could either just be messing around or doing it intentionally. You'll know.

We went a bit astray but let's go back.

To keep your emotions in check I recommend meditation and journaling. In the previous letter I talked about that. In this letter: "Why Suffering Makes You A Better Person" there's a part where I talked about how to manage your suffering through meditation and journaling.

Let's move on.

Be competent

The easiest way to gain respect is to actually be useful. If you are in a group and you have zero and close to nothing contribution—do not expect respect.

People respect leaders because of the value they bring. If you are not skilled, don't know how to help it's close to impossible getting respect. At best you will be liked but respected? No.

That's why most of the kids in high school or college who are failing at their studies always becomes the scapegoat purely because they aren't able to help. They cannot add value.

Although deep down they have other things they can contribute value to; The academic system requires memorization and analytics.

If you aren't able to do that then you will struggle.

There are situations where people will respect you and not.

Like for example: (Being in college)

• You are good at presentations. You are good at speaking however bad at numbers. When your group has to give a presentation people will look at you like you're their savior. But when it's time to do analysis of anything that needs solving people will ignore you. Given that in the group you have the best spoken skills.

• In another case you could be introverted but incredibly smart. You can do calculus. You can do research papers alone and get it right. When your group requires analysis people from your group will suddenly value what you say and other groups will also flock to you and ask for help. But when that specific project ends people will start to ignore you again. Why is that? I'll leave the answer to you. If you get the answer right I’ll send you the improved “10X Productivity Planner”

Some reminders on how to get respected:

• Never over explain. When your point has come through stop talking.

• Have boundaries or people will step all over you

• Pause before talking. Don't answer immediately. Wait 2 seconds at best.

• Proper body posture and confident body language

• Do not be loud. Do not shout unless necessary. Do not use foul language.

• Be direct and concise then ask for suggestions, don't use words like "I feel we should do this" say "We're better doing this, what do you think?

That's it.

See you next time

-Noat

If you want to get to the next level check out:

• Live Intentionally: 90 Day Self-Improvement Program Program By Harsh Strongman. Over 10k+ sold. Get rid of your bad habits and addiction fast and build discipline in 90 days. A 90 day project which aims to help you control your urges, become more disciplined and replace bad habits with productive habits. I've specifically used the tactics described in the e-book in the past to help me work 12 hours everyday. 10k sold and over 400+ 5 star verified ratings.

• The Illimitable Men Audiobook (26.5 Hours of Narration) Learn how to become a top tier man that commands respect, understands women and never gets used by other people again. In this Audiobook you will learn how to play social games and win. “If you hate yourself or do not value yourself, it’s because you’ve not given yourself a reason to value yourself. We don’t just disrespect others who are low value, we disrespect ourselves for it too” a quote from the audiobook.